As Valentine’s Day approaches, let’s take the time to strengthen the most important thing in our life: love. What better time to consciously strengthen it than Valentine’s Day, a day dedicated to showing our significant other how much they mean to us? However, Valentine’s Day is just one day of the year — it’s important to be cognizant of how we show love every single day.
Having a relationship that exemplifies strength, commitment, communication, laughter, fun, adventure, unity, friendship and love is key. On Feb. 14, let’s declutter and organize our relationship so 2023 becomes the year of love in the most incredible way. Based on my experience as the professional organizer of Modular Closets (DIY customizable closet units that organize any space in your home), I have discovered some helpful ways to declutter your relationship this Valentine’s Day and beyond.
First, can you declutter your relationship?
Yes, absolutely. We don’t often think of decluttering a relationship, but it simply means being conscious of what you allow in your relationship and what you want to focus on. Whether you are dating someone or have been married for years, it’s important to simplify your relationship and remember the purpose of being together. That is what decluttering is all about. Remember why you are together, why you love each other, and then do two things:
- Declutter anything that doesn’t allow you to be the best version of a couple.
- Organize your life to support the love you share.
It takes work to ensure your relationship is at its best. Let’s rephrase that: It takes love and commitment to ensure your relationship is at its best. This doesn’t mean it is hard and tiring, but it does mean you need to dedicate time to nurturing it. Say “no” to anything that doesn’t add happiness to your relationship, and focus on the things that bring you closer together and strengthen you as a couple.
Below are more ways to declutter and organize your relationship.
I have seen so many couples who haven’t had a date night in months or can’t remember the last time they did something fun together. This doesn’t have to be the status quo for your relationship. Pull your calendar out and plan in advance. Look at the month ahead and plan as many date nights as you can. Even one date is better than no date nights at all. This one simple step can drastically change your relationship for the better.
Quality is always the most important element. Life can fill up quickly with schedules, work and the kids’ soccer games, so commit to what works for you — but truly commit to that number. If it’s one date a month, make it a full day where the two of you can have a beautiful quality day together. If it’s two dates a month together, have fun planning two adventures a month that you can look forward to.
Spent Time Together
People are busier than ever these days, so it may not always be possible to go on lots of adventures and fancy date nights, and that’s OK. It’s more important to have quality time together. Plan a movie night, brunch at a cute local cafe or a romantic night of cooking dinner together. It doesn’t have to be anything extravagant. The most important thing is to set aside time to simply be together.
So many people hate saying no, but your happiness is more important than trying to please everyone. You can still deeply care for your family and friends and want to be a part of the events and celebrations in their lives, but this doesn’t mean you have to attend every single invitation. Sometimes it’s OK to stay home and not be a part of every social event. You need to ask yourself, “Is it more important to make everyone else happy and say yes all the time or to nurture my relationship and say no when we need time to ourselves?”
A great compromise is to attend the event, but let the hosts know you can only stay a couple of hours. This way you are able to spend time with your loved ones, but leave early enough to spend time together.
Prioritize Open Communication
Don’t harbor things inside of you. Be open with your partner on how you feel about your relationship. If you harbor things inside, you will eventually start to resent the other person and that is a recipe for disaster.
Don’t cast blame or start an ugly fight, but rather sit down with your significant other and let them know you miss them and you really want to work on spending more quality time together. Your partner will also appreciate your efforts.
Delegate, Delegate, Delegate
I often hear couples refer to the same routine in their lives: They have a long and busy day at work, come home to a house full of chores and things to do and eat dinner — and then it’s time to go to bed and start again. And weekends end up being the time to catch up on more house chores. I am not going to sugar coat it — life gets hectic and sometimes extremely overwhelming. This is why it’s important to outsource some things.
Can you hire a babysitter to watch the kids one night a week so you can enjoy date night? Can you hire a local college student to do your grocery shopping, allowing you an extra couple of hours with the family? Can you hire an assistant at work so your workload is less stressful, allowing you to come home happier and ready to spend time with your significant other? Imagine how much more time you could have together as a couple if you outsourced just five hours’ worth of things a week. You could spend an entire Saturday together.
To Wrap It All Up
All relationships take work and care to keep them strong. This Valentine’s Day, declutter and organize your relationship by planning dates ahead of time — they don’t need to be anything fancy, as the most important thing is that you are both spending time together. Also, decline social get-togethers with friends and family when you need time with your significant other. And prioritize open communication and delegate tasks to free up more time to spend with your partner. These are just a few impactful ways to declutter and strengthen your relationship.